Aunt Vadge: is my butthole weird?

Hi Aunt Vadge,

This website says all things vagina, but does it go to the butt area to? If so, I’m 15 and never had sex, but near my butthole is like extra skin? I don’t know what it is.

Also I have hair by my butthole. I don’t know whether to shave it or leave it. But I’m a dark-haired girl so it looks gross. And some discoloration to where I wipe. I’m mixed and it looks like poop is still there 24/7, but I wipe good!

Please help. 

Yours,
Perplexed

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Hi Perplexed,

Your butt is very normal!

1. Extra flaps of skin on your anus are common and normal. Buttholes are really weird things, and everyone’s is slightly different. You’ll find that the ‘perfect anus’ is rare. You can also freely have anus envy of those girls you see on the internet who have these tidy little buttholes without the tiniest blemish – then there’s everyone else, like us. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it except possibly get the little bits lopped off by a doctor, but that can cause scar tissue, which might look worse than your original flap.

Don’t worry about it. As long as your pooper does what it should, you are not in any danger of being classified as abnormal or gross. We always focus on the miniature of our bodies as if they are the most important thing, but I bet you are smart, funny and gorgeous, with other stand-out features. Nobody will ever care about your extra butthole flap. (If it makes you feel any better, I have one too.)

2. The flesh of our butt cracks is almost always ‘discoloured’ (read: normal), just the same way that our labia often are too. It’s actually the way we are built, and nobody will ever think you have not wiped properly, if they are ever inspecting your bum in such detail. Most people’s butts are like this in some way – just wait until you see a lover’s butt for the first time, no matter what shade he is. Baby’s bums are also like this, meaning, we are born this way.

What’s funny is that in the 80s, there was this big trend of anus bleaching that went on, and still does today – look it up. It’s hilarious.

You’ll see that everyone’s butt is different, and nobody should be judging anyone else’s butt – they are often bubbly, colourful (usually brown or pink, not poo related), and have extra bits. I’d recommend you stop looking at it. It isn’t going to improve or get worse.

3. Hair around your butthole is also very normal, and you can decide if you want to shave it or leave it. It might pay to do some experiments and see how you feel most comfortable – if getting rid of it makes you feel better, do it. If you don’t care, leave it. There is plenty of time to obsess over your pubic hair for the rest of your life, so experiment with what you prefer. It’s your butthole, and you can do whatever you like!

Check out our article on pubic hair to see if there are some other hair removal options that you might enjoy rather than shaving your butt (hair removal cream can be a bit more effective, particularly when you can’t see what you’re doing).

Butts are perfectly acceptable to discuss on All Things Vagina, since they are so close. If you have any more questions, let us know! We’d love to hear from you.

Warmest regards,

Aunt Vadge