Aunt Vadge: I only had my penis in her for a second – can she be pregnant?

Hello Aunt Vadge, 

My girlfriend is 24-years-old and she is a virgin. We were making out, and as we got horny, we tried to have sex. When I tried inserting my dick, she had pain, so I removed it and started to finger her. I did not insert my dick fully.

Also now she hasn’t got her periods. She get periods on 10th of every month and ends on 16th of every month. She got her last periods on 10th December and ended on 16th December and we tried this on 25th December. ‘Til now she hasn’t got her periods. I am writing this on 30th of January. She is saying she has symptoms of being pregnant. And she is very scared. Can you please help us. 

Note: I did not ejaculate or precum inside her vagina. I tried inserting my dick and she had pain so I removed it, which means I did not even insert fully inside.

Thanks, 
Sad

_____

Dear Sad,

Your girlfriend’s period does seem to be 20 days late, since it is now the beginning of February, and it is possible that she is pregnant. Your girlfriend needs to do a pregnancy test. If it’s negative, she is not pregnant, since it would show up on a test by now. If she is pregnant, well, you guys have a time ahead of you.

Unfortunately all it takes is one sperm to get into her vagina and swim up to her waiting egg. At the time you put your penis in her vagina without a condom on (and her not on birth control), if her cycles are as regular as she said, she it is very likely that she would have been ovulating or nearly ovulating. It is possible that there was precum on your penis that you weren’t aware of. Precum is precum – it is just there when you have an erection, not necessarily just before you ejaculate, and according to research, in some men it contains live sperm, and in some men it doesn’t. Maybe you are one of the guys who has live sperm hanging around well before you ejaculate. (How many a baby has been made!)

BUT.

Your girlfriend may have ovulated late – I’m not sure where you live or if you celebrate Christmas – you have tried to have sex on Christmas Day. This may mean a stressful time for your girlfriend, possibly even travel, which may have caused her to ovulate later than normal, which may explain the late arrival of her period.

If her cycle was exactly how it normally is – about 30 or 31 days long – then her ovulation would have been around 25-29 December. This is because we know that the number of days between ovulation and Day 1 of her next period is almost always the same, and almost always sits between 12-16 days. I’ve counted back from the 9th of January, and highlighted the 12, 13, 14, 15 and 16th days (backwards from the period that ovulation triggers).

Number on the left indicates Day of Cycle (usually 30 or 31 total cycle days for your girlfriend)
Number on right indicates day of the calendar month

  1. 10 December – period (cycle Day 1)
  2. 11
  3. 12
  4. 13
  5. 14
  6. 15
  7. 16
  8. 17
  9. 18
  10. 19
  11. 20
  12. 21
  13. 22
  14. 23
  15. 24
  16. 25 – if cycles are ‘normal’, possible ovulation days
  17. 26 – if cycles are normal, possible ovulation days
  18. 27 – if cycles are normal, possible ovulation days
  19. 28 – if cycles are normal, possible ovulation days
  20. 29 – if cycles are normal, possible ovulation days
  21. 30
  22. 31
  23. 1
  24. 2
  25. 3
  26. 4
  27. 5
  28. 6
  29. 7
  30. 8
  31. 9
  32. 10 January – period due if cycle is as per normal (Day 1 starts again)

Or, she may have another reason why her period was skipped that cycle, like ovarian cysts, which may block ovulation. It’s hard to know what’s going on, so you really need to do a test. Worry about unwanted pregnancies is really scary, so it’s important for you guys to both know when your girlfriend is ovulating. You can find out more about how to figure out if she is ovulating here. 

Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge