Something else? Ask Aunt Vadge – bottom left of your screen!
Dear Aunt Vadge,
I started having sex in 2014, and I’m easily affected by UTIs – at least twice a year. I share my concerns with my doctor occasionally, and after medication I soon recover, but I want to know why I keep getting them. Recently, in March 2016, sudden soreness appeared in my vagina during sex – a scratched, sore feeling, though it doesn’t hurt when I go to the toilet. Then within the same month, after vigorous sex, a small cut happened at the upper attachment of my clitoris. I saw a doctor, took medicine, and it recovered. Why did the cut happen, and why have I had UTIs, soreness and a cut all within two months? It’s the same partner, and we sometimes have sex without protection. I feel like something will always happen.
Best regards,
Concerned
Dear Concerned,
Sex is a dirty, rough business. Penetration can irritate the urethra, letting bacteria already living there proliferate, and bacteria spread easily from the anus to the vagina. Yeasts and other microbes cause issues in the vaginal tissue quite often, but if you’re getting frequent infections and cuts, something needs adjusting.
Only have penetrative sex when your vagina is turned on enough
Some infections arise because the urethra is irritated, so make sure you’re well warmed up – horny and wet – before sex. The vagina should be lubed up and ready to be penetrated. You’ll find you get more infections when you have sex before your vagina is fully ready, so just avoid it – it’s no good anyway, and it results in more frequent infections.
Bacteria and your urethra
Most urinary tract infections (UTIs) are caused by E. coli bacteria from the rectum, so good sexual hygiene matters. That means urinating after sex every single time, rinsing off in the shower too, and making sure you’re both reasonably clean beforehand. His butt bacteria can infect you too.
A short perineum
I know it sounds grim that bacteria from your anus (or his) is getting into your urethra, but it happens all the time because of how close the vagina is to the anus. Some women have a very short perineum and are very prone to UTIs, because as a penis pushes into the vagina, the perineum can be pulled so the anus sits very close to the vagina. Get a mirror and see how short or long your perineum is, and whether there’s a structural thing contributing to your more frequent infections.
Your intestines need work
A common cause of more frequent UTIs is that your (or his) gut bacteria is out of whack, making the rest of your body more prone to infection. A lot of antibiotics, a bout of gastro, or a poor diet can let your bad bacteria (pathogens) grow more numerous in your (or his) gut, so the chances of infection go up. You might even have developed biofilms in your intestines that make it hard for good bacteria to survive.
A good way to combat this is to increase your intake of fermented food and drinks, and if you like, a probiotic capsule once or twice a day. You can even try an enzyme product designed to kill biofilms in the gut.
The first thing I’d look at is your gut bacteria – both of you. Having plenty of good bacteria in your urethra, vagina and bowel means more of them to fight off the bad, and hopefully fewer infections. It works for all parts of the body, since these bacteria keep pathogens in check. It also means fewer strange cuts and tears, because your flesh will be strong and healthy – not that you’ll never get a sex wound, but your skin will be more resistant to damage.
Hygiene
Next, be hygienic in your sex practices: no fingers, penises or toys in the butt then the vagina, pee after sex, use condoms if it helps avoid infections, and be aware of how short or long your perineum is, since you may need to adjust your positions to account for it. UTIs are horrible, and taking antibiotics all the time isn’t good for your gut colonies – it can deplete your army of good bacteria and leave you open to more infections later by allowing pathogenic biofilms to develop.
Your partner’s semen
Another factor could be your partner’s semen, though this is still being investigated. If he’s changed his diet or become less healthy since you’ve known him, that could affect his semen, which could in turn affect your body. It’s not impossible, so keep it in mind – it could pay to use condoms for a while and see if it helps.
There’s a lot to think about with UTIs, so see our UTI page for tips on treating them at home yourself – you can. Read the warnings, though.
Your cut
The cut you describe sounds like the attachment from the clitoral hood to the inner labia (labia minora), which can be due to a lack of lubrication – but only you know that. Cuts happen quite easily if you do the wrong thing; our vaginal and vulvar tissue is really delicate, despite its durability. It heals quickly and doesn’t scar, but practice is the only way to learn how you got cut and how long it takes to heal.
Buy some good-quality silicone lubricant and, before sex, smooth some around your whole vulva. Sex involves the whole vulva, not just the vagina, since your bodies push against each other and pubic hair and skin can be abrasive with pressure behind them. And always make sure you’re turned on before your lover touches your vagina or vulva. It matters.
Write any time.
Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge
This is general information, not a substitute for personalised medical advice.
