Something else? Ask Aunt Vadge – bottom left of your screen!
Dear Aunt Vadge,
My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time four days ago. The day before, I started bleeding a little, nothing much. My periods have been irregular ever since I got the little stick in my arm that prevents pregnancy for a few years [the Implanon hormonal implant].
I’ve still had a little bleeding and some discharge ever since we had sex. The main problem is that when I pee it really stings – not the whole time, just the last few drops, and they sting like mad. I’m getting worried something might be wrong. I really don’t want to contact a doctor, because I’m terrified of them.
Is something wrong with me? Lots of love from freezing Norway, hope you answer soon.
Sincerely,
Freezing Cold from Norway
Hello our Norwegian friend,
Thank you for writing, and well done for paying attention to your body. That last-few-drops stinging when you pee is the classic sign of an irritated urethra, which is often a mild urinary tract infection (UTI) picked up around first-time sex. On its own, that’s common and usually settles.
One thing does matter here, though: you’ve got stinging plus ongoing bleeding plus new discharge after sex with a new partner. That combination is worth getting checked properly, because the exact same symptoms can be caused by a common infection passed on during sex, such as chlamydia. Chlamydia often has no other signs at all, it’s very treatable, and the only way to know is a simple test. Please don’t let it ride just because it feels minor.
I completely understand being scared of doctors. You don’t need a scary appointment for this. In Norway there are free, confidential youth health services (helsestasjon for ungdom) where you can talk to a nurse who does exactly this all day and won’t judge you – and many places let you do an STI test yourself without an examination. If it helps, you can bring a friend. Nothing about this makes you in trouble or abnormal; it’s just body maintenance.
While you’re sorting the test, our page on treating a UTI at home has our reflexology method and other comfort measures that can ease the stinging – drink plenty of water alongside it. These are lovely for settling a mild irritation, but they’re support, not a substitute for a check when there’s bleeding and discharge in the mix.
As for whether to have sex again: only ever if and when you want to, never because someone expects it. And while things are stinging, bleeding, and not yet sorted, the kind thing to do for your own body is to press pause until you’re comfortable and you’ve had that check. Anyone worth being with will happily wait.
For the future, a couple of simple habits really cut down on UTIs: pee soon after sex to flush things through, and keep anything that’s touched the bottom well away from the vagina. That’s most of it.
Get seen sooner rather than later if the stinging gets worse, you get pain in your back or side, a fever, or the bleeding picks up – that means it needs proper care quickly. Otherwise, book that confidential test, be gentle with yourself, and write back anytime.
Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge
This is general information, not a substitute for personalised medical advice.
