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Hi Aunt Vadge,
So I want to use tampons and every time I insert one it goes in exactly right. I can move around and not feel it at all, but after about 5–10 minutes I can start to feel it pushing down, coming away from the top, if you get what I mean? So it will not stay in place.
What do I do? Also, I’m a virgin.
Yours,
Falling Out
Hi there Falling Out,
Two quick reassurances before the how-to. You can absolutely use tampons as a virgin – they won’t ‘take’ your virginity or damage anything. The hymen is a soft, stretchy rim, not a seal, and a tampon slips past it comfortably once you have the knack. And a tampon that keeps sliding down almost always just means it isn’t in far enough. It’s a placement thing, not a you thing.
When a tampon sits too low, in the narrower neck of the vagina, your muscles feel it as something to push out, so down it comes. Get it up higher, into the roomier space just below the cervix, and it settles in and you stop noticing it.
How you get it up there depends on your type:
- Applicator tampons: slide the applicator in as far as it comfortably goes, angled towards the small of your back (your vagina runs backwards on a diagonal, not straight up). Push the plunger to release the tampon right up high, then remove the applicator.
- Non-applicator tampons: push it in with your finger, aiming towards your tailbone, until a couple of knuckles – most of your finger – are inside. At that depth you can let go and it should stay put.
Have a look at the diagrams in vag basics so the angle makes sense.
One safety habit worth building in from the start: change your tampon every 4 to 8 hours, use the lowest absorbency that gets you through the day, and don’t leave one in for more than 8 hours or forget one is in there. Leaving a tampon in too long is linked to a rare but serious infection called toxic shock syndrome, so if you ever get a high fever, vomiting, a rash or suddenly feel very unwell while wearing one, take it out and get medical help. That’s rare – the routine is simply: in far enough, out on time.
If you are still wrestling with them after a few goes, pads or period undies are a perfectly good option too – no pressure either way.
This is general information, not a substitute for personalised medical advice.
Write anytime.
Love,
Aunt Vadge
