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Dear Aunt Vadge,
I’m a 19-year-old college student in Texas. On July tenth my boyfriend fingered me, and the day after I started bleeding – red spotting with some clots – and didn’t stop for a month. I didn’t get my normal-flow period for July or August.
A couple of days ago my boyfriend fingered me again and I’m in the same boat: bleeding the next day, some bigger clots, enough that I need a panty liner, and blood visible on the paper and sometimes in the toilet.
I last had actual vaginal sex around the first of May – we used a condom and he pulled out, and we checked it for holes afterwards. I got my period a couple of days after, and a normal one the month after, so I don’t think I’m pregnant. I had two normal periods, then after being fingered (kind of rough) everything went out of whack.
There was some pain during the fingering, but only in brief moments – it felt like he was going too fast and too hard. I was wet, enjoying it, and did orgasm. My periods are very irregular and I always have clotting. The last few days the bleeding has got heavier and still has clots, but nowhere near my normal flow. What is wrong with me?
– Concerned
Dear Concerned,
Nothing you’ve described sounds like something is ‘wrong with you’ in a frightening way, so let’s take the fear down first, then be straight about why this one does need a proper check. Bleeding between periods like this has a medical name – metrorrhagia – and at 19, with already-irregular cycles, the most likely explanation is hormonal rather than anything sinister.
The clue is the clots. Clots mean the blood is coming from your uterus, not from a little tear in the vaginal skin – a graze would just ooze and wouldn’t have time to clot. So this isn’t your boyfriend’s fingers cutting you; it’s more likely your uterine lining shedding at odd times, and an orgasm (where the uterus contracts) helping push that clotty blood out afterwards. That’s why it seems to follow the fingering, even though the fingering probably isn’t the real cause.
Why the lining sheds at random: irregular cycles usually mean you’re not ovulating every month, and without ovulation you don’t make enough progesterone to hold the lining steady, so it breaks down and spots unpredictably. This is extremely common at your age and is covered in the dysfunctional uterine bleeding article. One factor that can drive it is low body fat – fat tissue helps make oestrogen, and if you’re on the lean side your body can struggle to ovulate. That’s not a criticism, just one thing a doctor or naturopath can look at gently if it fits you.
Another common, harmless cause of bleeding specifically after fingering or sex is cervical ectropion – soft cells from inside the cervix sitting on the outer surface, where they’re delicate and bleed easily when bumped. It’s benign, common at your age and on the pill, and shows up on a simple cervical look.
The real reason to book in, though: a month of continuous bleeding plus two missed normal periods is more than a one-off, and the only way to sort the likely-hormonal picture from the less common causes is an in-person check. That means a doctor to do a pelvic and cervical exam and an STI screen (infection and HPV-related changes can cause bleeding too) – we don’t do physical exams at My Vagina, so that part belongs with a clinician. Serious causes are rare at 19, but persistent bleeding is exactly the thing you get looked at rather than wait out.
You don’t need lots of money for this: a college student health centre, a Planned Parenthood, or a low-cost women’s health clinic will see you, keep it confidential, and this is bread-and-butter for them. If cost or getting there is an issue, ask the student health service what’s free or sliding-scale near you – there’s almost always an option.
Go before the next round of bleeding if you can, and if it ever becomes soaking-heavy (a pad an hour), comes with severe pain, dizziness or fainting, treat that as urgent and go the same day.
This is general information, not a substitute for personalised medical advice.
Come back and tell me what they find.
Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge
