Aunt Vadge: four fingers and now I’m bleeding and sore – what’s happened?

Dear Aunt Vadge, 

My boyfriend was fingering me earlier today, and he was using four fingers and was being a bit rough, but that’s how I like it. It usually takes me a while to orgasm, so he was like, ‘Hey my hands cramping,’ and he pulls his hand out, and it’s literally covered in blood. Like this weird bright-orangey-red, and was thin and all over his hand, mixed with like the rest of everything else going on there.

So we both just stared at it, like what the hell is that, and we thought maybe my period started early, but that wasn’t it. Then I just cleaned up and we got back to doing our thing. We had sex and it was a bit uncomfortable for me, but we kept going anyways. Later I went to take a shower and I felt down there, and it felt like there was a tear.

I wanted to know if there was any way he could’ve torn my skin. It’s a weird torn feeling near the bottom of the opening, and it still feels uncomfortable till now and it’s been six hours. Is it possible for it to be something else? I wasn’t virgin when this happened, but I never bled when I lost my virginity, so maybe it could be that? I don’t know… HELP PLEASE!!!

Yours,
Bleeding Vag
Age: 18
Country/Area: United States, NYC

Dear Bleeding Vag,

It sounds like your boyfriend’s fingers have definitely done some damage to you. Four fingers is a big package, rough, and add fingernails to that, and it’s a recipe for damage.

You’ll heal, but in the meantime, no more touching your vagina until it’s all healed up. You have a wound that needs to be left alone to stitch itself back together.

When there is no pain at all, you can go for it. It will likely take up to a week to heal, so just take it easy.

It is not your delayed virginity bleeding – that is not a thing. If you have been getting roughly finger-banged with four fingers, your hymen is long gone baby.

Write anytime!

Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge

Jessica Lloyd - Naturopathic Practitioner, BHSc(N)

Jessica Lloyd - Naturopathic Practitioner, BHSc(N)

Jessica is a degree-qualified naturopath (BHSc) specialising in vulvovaginal health and disease, based in Melbourne, Australia.

Jessica is the owner and lead naturopath of My Vagina, and is a member of the:

  • International Society for the Study of Vulvovaginal Disease (ISSVD)
  • International Society for the Study of Women's Sexual Health (ISSWSH)
  • National Vulvodynia Association (NVA) Australia
  • New Zealand Vulvovaginal Society (ANZVS)
  • Australian Traditional Medicine Society (ATMS)
Read more about Jessica and My Vagina's origin story.