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Hi Aunt Vadge,
My problem started a couple of months ago. During masturbating, I had to stop because I had a sharp pain on my labia. I took a mirror and looked, and saw that the skin connecting my clitoris to my right flap of labia had torn slightly.
I told my mum and asked if I could go to the doctor because I thought I might need stitches, and she said no, that it would heal itself. I looked everywhere online and I feel really alone, and it makes me scared.
It happened again more recently – a little uncomfortable rather than intense pain – and those two tiny flaps of skin on the clit, the right one is slightly disconnected. There has never been blood, redness, swelling or discharge. It is just pain, and the first tear was the worst, lasting about a week.
I never really had a clitoral hood that stays over my clitoris – I can easily see my clit. I wonder if the circular motions are ripping the skin. Should I see a gynaecologist or a doctor? How much do these cost?
Sincerely,
Freaking Out
Hi there,
The little join between your clitoral hood and your inner labia is one of the most delicate spots on the whole vulva, and it splits easily with friction. Most of the time a small tear like this heals on its own within a week or so, as long as you give it a rest and don’t re-open it. So first things first: you’re not broken, and you almost certainly don’t need stitches.
Helping a small tear heal
- Give the area a proper rest from any rubbing or friction until it’s fully healed. Re-opening a tear before it closes is what keeps the pain going.
- A little plain, unscented oil or ointment (coconut or olive oil, or plain pawpaw ointment) keeps the skin supple so it slides instead of catching. Dry tears hurt more.
- Skip soap and washes on the area – warm water is plenty, and soap just dries the skin out further.
When it keeps happening in the same spot
A one-off tear here is extremely common and nothing to worry about. But skin that splits in the same place again and again is worth having a doctor actually look at. One cause of fragile vulval skin that keeps re-tearing in the same spot is a condition called lichen sclerosus, and it’s more common and more under-diagnosed in young women than most people realise. The good news is it’s very treatable once it’s spotted, so it’s worth ruling out rather than guessing. You can read about lichen sclerosus (LS) here.
We’re a naturopathic clinic and we don’t do internal or physical exams, so this is one where someone needs to physically look to say for sure what’s going on. That doesn’t have to be a big scary gynaecology appointment.
Getting it looked at, without the drama
You don’t have to wait for permission or an expensive specialist. A local sexual health or family-planning clinic can check this, and in a lot of places they’ll see you confidentially, often free or low-cost, without a parent in the room. A school nurse or a youth health service counts too.
Your mum’s not wrong that most small tears heal by themselves – they do. The bit worth getting checked is the ‘it keeps coming back in the same place’ part, so it’s completely fair to go back to her with exactly that: it’s not improving, and you’d like someone to have a proper look. In the meantime, rest it, keep it soft, and try not to panic. You really are going to be fine.
For soothing and healing minor cuts and tears, here’s how to deal with cuts and tears from fingering and rough sex.
Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge
This is general information and not a substitute for personalised medical advice. Skin that keeps splitting in the same spot should be looked at in person by a doctor or nurse.
