Aunt Vadge: Do I need to tell my partner?

Young woman standing looking indecisive near her boyfriend as she contemplates whether to disclose that she had BV or not

Dear Aunt Vadge,

I had BV in the past, and I have a new partner now and I’m wondering, am I supposed to tell my partner about this? I want to be honest, and it might come back, so I’m just not sure if I should say something or not.

Please can you advise!

Age 24


Dear Worried,

Revealing a past vaginal infection like bacterial vaginosis (BV) is like discussing your previous favourite restaurant – you can share if you want, but it’s not mandatory!

First of all, big props for considering honesty. It’s a fantastic trait in any relationship. However, there’s no absolute obligation to disclose past health issues that are no longer a part of your life.

Think of it this way: you’ve had a common cold before, right? You don’t feel compelled to tell your partner about every sneeze in your past. BV is a bit like that. It’s something that happened, but it doesn’t define you.

If you feel comfortable sharing your BV experience, go for it! It’s a great way to promote open communication and trust in your relationship. Plus, it can be a bonding moment – sharing personal health stories can bring couples closer together.

But if you’d rather keep it to yourself, that’s perfectly fine too. Your health history is your business, and you decide what feels right to share.

The key in any relationship is the here and now. Enjoy your time with your new partner, and let your shared experiences create the foundation for a beautiful connection.

Wishing you all the happiness in your relationship journey!

Aunt Vadge

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