Aunt Vadge: my shower head cut me while masturbating – will I be ok?

Hello Aunt Vadge, 

Um… so, back last year I was masturbating with a shower head and this was one you could adjust the spray to, so I was trying out different… sprays. One of which was a mist-like one, where if brought close to the skin, it would feel like pins and needles. Unbeknownst to the troubles it could cause, I pressed it close to my clitoris. Sure enough, it didn’t feel bad.

That is, until I felt a sharp stinging sensation and looked down to see that little piece of skin under my clit (the one where the hood meets and spreads out to the vaginal flaps), which I think is on the clitoral glans, is basically cut in two. It stings, and when I dabbed it, a pinkish coloured substance came out.

In the weeks following the incident, I researched and read that a small tear would heal on it’s own; I didn’t tell any of my aunts or father. Weeks after the incident, the pain soon dulled before vanishing completely.

The tear, however, was still there. I am very scared because today I wore leggings underneath my jeans (it was cold, so I like to have layers) and I think all those layers rubbed against my tear because now, when the cloth of my panties so much as brushes against it, it stings.

I figured it would have healed on it’s own, but I’ve never been to a gynecologist and don’t fancy explaining something like,’Hey, Auntie, I ripped the skin underneath my clitorus while masturbating with a showerhead, but the tear hasn’t healed in about the year I’ve had it.’

Finger stimulation to the clitorus doesn’t hurt, or didn’t. Briefly, I did it earlier, and if I brushed against the tear separating the skin, it stung. I’m deeply concerned not only about infection or permanent damage, but if I get married how intercourse will play out. 

Please help, I’m very frightened. If need be, I will tell one of my aunt’s. Better safe than sorry, right? 

Sincerely,
Torn
United States, Age 15

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Clitoral CutsHi Torn,

It sounds like you have split the join between your clitoral hood and the labia, which is a really common tear, and very easy to do accidentally. Normally cuts like this heal by themselves, but if the tear was so big that your skin has separated from your labia or another structure, it could pay to get checked out. It’s hard to know from here, so if it isn’t healed up by now, go see someone. Yes, it’s better safe than sorry.

I know it’s awkward to discuss this with your aunts or even a doctor, but keep in mind your aunts have vaginas too, vaginas that over their lifetimes have had all sorts of things in and out of them, possibly including babies.

This means they are probably more familiar with tears than you might think. I think it’s cool that you are trying different ways to masturbate, and while that’s a kinda embarrassing thing to talk about, especially to your relatives, it could pay to pull your favourite and most sexually experienced aunt aside and say you have torn your labia a bit (“by mistake”). You can ask them to take a look, or to please take you to a vagina/vulva doctor to be checked out.

Or, find your local sexual health clinic (they are usually free) and make an appointment to have someone check you out if it seems like something has gone wrong and isn’t healing correctly. Wounds will heal if you give them some space to do so, so make sure you aren’t disturbing the wound.

The cut can be easily disturbed by tight clothes, as you’ve experienced. Keep the area clean, dry (but with some vegetable oil to lubricate the flesh as it heals), no masturbating or sexual activities, and just warm water, being really gentle.

Also, it seems unlikely that it would affect your future sex life – your vagina is a very durable, despite being easily damaged, and even if you had changed the shape of your flesh a tiny bit, it won’t affect how sex feels or looks.

Write back if you get stuck or are still worried.

Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge

 

Jessica Lloyd - Naturopathic Practitioner, BHSc(N)

Jessica Lloyd - Naturopathic Practitioner, BHSc(N)

Jessica is a degree-qualified naturopath (BHSc) specialising in vulvovaginal health and disease, based in Melbourne, Australia.

Jessica is the owner and lead naturopath of My Vagina, and is a member of the:

  • International Society for the Study of Vulvovaginal Disease (ISSVD)
  • International Society for the Study of Women's Sexual Health (ISSWSH)
  • National Vulvodynia Association (NVA) Australia
  • New Zealand Vulvovaginal Society (ANZVS)
  • Australian Traditional Medicine Society (ATMS)
Read more about Jessica and My Vagina's origin story.
Jessica Lloyd - Naturopathic Practitioner, BHSc(N)

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