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Hello Aunt Vadge,
A male friend and I were at the beach, just us. He started fingering me, and for the most part it was good, but when he switched hands I felt a scratch, and another as he pulled his hand out. The feeling was on the outside of my vagina, not inside.
When I got home and went to pee, it stung very badly, and the next morning it still stings and is irritated only after peeing. I showered and flushed down there in case of sand, but I still feel there may be little scratches.
What do I do?
Sincerely,
Scratched
United States
Dear Scratched,
This sounds like exactly what it feels like – a couple of small scratches to the delicate skin around the vaginal opening, almost certainly from friction, and very possibly a stray grain of sand acting like sandpaper when he switched hands.
The reason it stings so much when you wee is that urine is running over those little grazes on the outside, not because anything’s wrong inside, which is why it’s only sore on peeing and settles in between. It’s the most ordinary thing, and it heals fast.
So a few simple things will sort it.
Pour a jug of warm water over yourself as you wee, or wee in the shower – it dilutes the urine so it doesn’t sting on the grazes – and otherwise just rinse with plain warm water (no soaps), pat dry, wear loose cotton, and leave it alone to heal over the next few days, drinking plenty of water too.
The one thing to keep half an eye on is that new sexual activity can occasionally trigger a urinary tract infection, so if the stinging turns into a constant urge to pee, burning the whole time rather than just on peeing, cloudy or smelly urine, or any lower-back pain or fever, see a doctor for a quick check.
But from what you’ve described – grazes that sting on peeing and are already easing – this is minor and self-healing. Reassure your friend; he hasn’t done you any lasting harm, and a bit more lube and gentleness next time avoids it entirely.
For soothing and healing minor cuts and tears, here’s how to deal with cuts and tears from fingering and rough sex.
Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge
This is general information, not a substitute for personalised medical advice.
