Something else? Ask Aunt Vadge – bottom left of your screen!
Dear Aunt Vadge,
I’ve been with my partner about 11 months. I’m on birth control and we don’t use condoms. I think I’ve had a yeast infection for a while, and over the last three months the symptoms have progressed — sex isn’t very enjoyable.
It feels fine at first, but afterwards I’m sore and notice two or three tiny cuts on my perineum. They only appear after sex, or if I itch too hard, or when he inserts his fingers. I know I need to see the gyno but I’m afraid of what I’ll hear.
My symptoms are itching around the inside and the opening, swelling after sex, and thick white discharge — no odour at all. When I research it, all I see is genital herpes and I’m terrified. I’ve never had flu-like symptoms or a pins-and-needles feeling, and the cuts heal in two or three days but always come back after sex.
Are they from the yeast, or do they sound like herpes? Any reassurance would be great.
Yours,
Freaked Out
Age 21, United States
Dear Freaked Out,
Take a deep breath, because I can reassure you on the big fear straight away: this really doesn’t sound like herpes.
You’ve worked it out yourself — no flu-like symptoms, no tingling or pins-and-needles warning, and what you have is itching with thick white discharge, no odour, and tiny cuts that come only after sex or hard itching and heal in a couple of days.
Herpes announces itself with painful blisters that break into ulcers, usually with that tingling warning beforehand, and it doesn’t produce thick white discharge.
What you’re describing is the classic picture of an ongoing yeast infection, exactly as you suspected: the itch, the thick no-smell discharge, the swelling after sex, and the recurrent little splits — yeast makes the skin fragile, so it tears at the perineum with friction and then heals, over and over.
So the fear that’s kept you away from the gyno is almost certainly unfounded — and ironically, the thing you’re scared to hear is one of the most manageable diagnoses there is.
That said, please do go, because three months of progressing symptoms deserves a proper look and, importantly, a swab: a swab confirms it’s yeast and identifies the strain, which matters because a stubborn or non-albicans strain needs different treatment from ordinary thrush, and recurrent yeast often needs a proper course (sometimes a longer or maintenance antifungal regimen from your doctor) rather than a one-off.
It’s also worth knowing that being on the pill, plus a diet high in refined carbs, can tip some women into recurrent yeast, and there’s a gut element to it — so supporting your general gut health (cutting back on sugar and simple carbs, plenty of fibre, a good probiotic) alongside proper antifungal treatment helps it stick.
In the meantime, be gentle with the fragile skin: plain-water washing, no scented products, plenty of lube for sex so it doesn’t tear, and don’t itch it. You’ve done the hard diagnostic thinking already; now let a doctor confirm and treat it properly, because this is fixable and not the scary thing you’ve been dreading.
Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge
This is general information, not a substitute for personalised medical advice.
