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Hi Aunt Vadge,
Almost three weeks ago I had rough sex that left a tear at the back of my vagina. It looked bad and swollen at the time, but the swelling and pain have since subsided – though I’m left with a nasty tear still.
It’s never bled and doesn’t seem to be an open wound, but I’m scared my vagina won’t return to normal and I’ll be left with this forever. From my research it seems like a first-degree tear, but I’m unsure of the difference between first and second degree.
My healthcare provider’s only advice was to keep it clean, take baths and refrain from sex – I’m doing all that and the tear is still there. I’m getting worried.
Yours,
Worried
Age 19, UK
Dear Worried,
Three weeks is long enough that I’d want a nurse or doctor to actually look – not because a non-healing tear is usually anything serious, but because ‘it’s not bleeding, not obviously open, but it’s just sitting there not closing’ is exactly the kind of thing worth eyes-on rather than research and worry.
A sexual-health clinic or your GP can tell you in minutes what stage it’s at and whether it needs anything to help it along.
For context, so it’s less frightening: most vulval and vaginal tears are first-degree (just the surface skin or lining) and heal on their own within a couple of weeks, while second-degree go a bit deeper into the muscle underneath and can take longer.
Either way, vulval tissue is some of the fastest-healing in the body, so ‘left with an open tear forever’ is very unlikely.
What can hold a tear up is constant re-irritation, or a spot of granulation tissue (overgrown healing tissue that stays raw and won’t close over) – both easily sorted once someone spots them, which is the other reason a look is worth it.
You’re already doing the right things: keep it clean with plain water, rest from sex, and don’t poke or stretch it to check, because that reopens it. Add a dab of plain oil to keep the skin supple, and get it seen if it’s no better in another week or so, or sooner if it turns hot, swollen, weepy or smelly.
You will return to normal – this just needs a professional eye to confirm it’s healing as it should.
Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge
This is general information, not a substitute for personalised medical advice.
