Aunt Vadge: why am I bleeding so much after just a small amount of fingering?

Hi there Aunt Vadge, 

I’m 16 this year, and really worried as when my boyfriend fingered me it was really painful and not pleasurable at all. He only went in a few times. Later on after I went to the toilet I realized I was bleeding, and it turns out that he did not cut his nails before fingering me. I’m scared as the amount of blood that I’ve seen coming out is quite a lot.

Today’s the third day and there’s still a lot of blood. I went to try to examine my vag and saw a cut. I read up and the websites say that there’s probably scratches inside (?) but if it’s only scratches, why am I bleeding so much? Plus my period ended 8-9 days ago so it can’t be that I’m on my period, as I’m always regular.

What do you think happened? Am I bleeding so much because of the external cut? Is there anyway I could keep myself more sanitized? Right now I’m just wearing panty liners. 
Thank you for your help , I really appreciate it 🙂

Yours,
Bleeding

Hi there Raeann,

First off, you shouldn’t be bleeding that much. It does seem excessive. Your boyfriend may have damaged your hymen – have you inserted anything into your vagina prior to your boyfriend’s fingers?

He really needs to take more care with your vagina, but you are the boss of your vagina – don’t let him ever hurt you. Sex is supposed to feel good, not hurt. Any bleeding or pain needs to be stopped – by you – immediately.

You’ll need to do some investigations into this yourself, so I would recommend trying to figure out exactly where the bleeding is coming from. Get a hand mirror and a torch/ your smartphone (with the camera, don’t forget to delete after!) and get some lube/coconut oil, and really gently feel around. You will feel a sore spot/s somewhere, and you need to determine what’s happened.

You and your boyfriend need to read fingering basics, and make sure you are aware of what your hymen should look like and feel like, if it’s still around.

Blood is ok – don’t worry about sanitation. The bleeding should stop and is not dirty.

The other thing I’m wondering is if you have had a vaginal examination before? If not, you might benefit from being checked out, just in case you have what’s known as a vaginal septum. These are an anatomical abnormality that means a piece of skin separates your vagina either horizontally or vertically, so when you try to put something into your vagina, it encounters resistance and that can cause bleeding. You can have a feel around and see what you can see and feel. If you can put two fingers easily into your vagina without encountering any obstacles, you are probably ok, and if you have used tampons without issue, you are likely fine and the incident was due to your boyfriend’s long nails (definite no-no for fingering!).

Let me know what you find – we can investigate a bit further.

Warmest regards,
Aunt Vadge

Posted on Last updated :October 20, 2018